{"id":17,"date":"2007-12-06T00:26:00","date_gmt":"2007-12-05T22:26:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sergiumotreanu.wordpress.com\/2007\/12\/06\/hanul-sfantului-nicolae-2\/"},"modified":"2007-12-06T00:26:00","modified_gmt":"2007-12-05T22:26:00","slug":"hanul-sfantului-nicolae-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/?p=17","title":{"rendered":"Hanul Sfantului Nicolae"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cS\u0103 stau \u00een hanul din spatele norilor ?<br \/>\nS\u0103 \u00eencerc s\u0103 nu mai fiu ce-am fost ?<br \/>\nS\u0103 \u00eencerc s\u0103 fiu ce nu voi mai fi ?<br \/>\nS\u0103-mi stimulez negativ sinapsele ?<br \/>\nS\u0103 sap \u00eentr-o groap\u0103 care m\u0103 sugrum\u0103<br \/>\npe masur\u0103 ce \u00eei consum substan\u0163a ?<br \/>\nS\u0103-mi termin ideea \u00eenainte de-a o \u00eencepe ?<br \/>\nS\u0103 strabat cele dou\u0103 sensuri ale direc\u0163iei<br \/>\n\u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 infirm paradoxul lui Zenon ?<br \/>\n\u015ei s\u0103-mi dau seama c\u0103 m-am \u00een\u015felat ca \u015fi el ?<\/p>\n<p>Dar toate astea pu\u0163in prea t\u00e2rziu.<\/p>\n<p>Le-a\u015f face oare ? Poate &#8230;<br \/>\nUnde ? Poate &#8230; pe alt\u0103 lume, \u015fi doar \u00een alt\u0103 via\u0163\u0103<br \/>\nC\u00e2nd ? Poate &#8230; c\u00e2nd nu iube\u015fti, \u015fi doar atunci.<br \/>\nNerv, pustiu, confuzie, &#8230; , vorbesc cu umbra mea ?<br \/>\nNu &#8230; a murit si ea.<\/p>\n<p>Eu ? Nu a\u015f obiecta prea mult dac\u0103 ar veni ea s\u0103-mi \u00eenchid\u0103 ochii &#8230;<br \/>\ndac\u0103 nu a\u015f iubi.<br \/>\n&#8230;<br \/>\nDup\u0103 ceva timp o conving c\u0103 nu merit o alt\u0103 via\u0163\u0103 &#8211; moartea &#8211; &#8230; pentru c\u0103 iubesc.<br \/>\nM-am mirat c\u0103 a acceptat, dar ea \u015ftia ceea ce eu nu \u015ftiam. Ce \u015ftia ?<br \/>\n\u015etia c\u0103 o dragoste nu e de-ajuns pentru am\u00e2ndoi.<br \/>\n\u015etia c\u0103 nu m\u0103 merita. Cine ?<br \/>\nO anonim\u0103 pentru mul\u0163i, nu \u015fi pentru mine<br \/>\nUn diavol pentru mul\u0163i, pentru mine un \u00eenger<br \/>\nUn de\u015fert pentru mul\u0163i, pentru mine o oaz\u0103<br \/>\nUn regret pentru mul\u0163i, pentru mine o speran\u0163\u0103.<br \/>\nEu nu-i cunosc pe cei mul\u0163i, dar o cunosc pe ea<br \/>\n\u015ei mi-e de ajuns ? Nu &#8230; vreau ca \u015fi ea s\u0103 m\u0103 cunoasc\u0103 pe mine &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>\u00cen clipa aceea s-a dest\u0103inuit &#8230; lui \u015fi oamenilor<br \/>\n\u015ei-a intrigat, \u015fi-a speriat, \u015fi-a \u00eenviat pe mul\u0163i (&#8230;)<\/p>\n<p>(Despre poezie \/\/ nefinisat\u0103 va r\u0103m\u00e2ne, neterminat\u0103 nu \/\/ a\u015fa voi crede eu).<br \/>\nDar nimic nu se termin\u0103 niciodat\u0103 &#8211; c\u00e2te sensuri pot avea aceste cuvinte !@!)<\/p>\n<p>\u015ei a mai spus ceva: (scopul) \u00eentregul e grandios, (mijloacele) detaliile sunt &#8230; pula.<br \/>\nDup\u0103 asta, \u015fi-a dat seama c\u0103, de\u015fi suna c\u00e2t de c\u00e2t inteligibil \u015fi adresabil maselor remarca,<br \/>\nnu era nici pe departe adevarat\u0103 \u015fi probabil c\u0103 nu era nici cea mai inspirat\u0103 formul\u0103.<br \/>\nDar a l\u0103sat-o a\u015fa &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Aceste cuvinte care mie \u00eemi par vl\u0103guite \u015fi lipsite de tonus, vor impresiona \u015fi vor motiva<br \/>\ncu siguran\u0163\u0103 mul\u0163i oameni.<\/p>\n<p>\u015ei mai e o problem\u0103, de altfel poate chiar cea mai mare problem\u0103 a mea:<\/p>\n<p>Vr\u00e2nd-nevr\u00e2nd, m\u0103 contrazic; sunt con\u015ftient de asta \u015fi totu\u015fi nu pot face nimic.<br \/>\nExist\u0103 \u00eens\u0103 o explica\u0163ie simpl\u0103: adev\u0103rul este at\u00e2t de relativ sau nu mai este deloc<br \/>\n\u00eenc\u00e2t trebuie s\u0103 fiu extrem de labil \u00een idei sau s\u0103 nu mai fiu deloc.<\/p>\n<p>Sunt mai mult ca sigur c\u0103 m\u0103 voi contrazice \u00een cur\u00e2nd \u015fi \u00een leg\u0103tur\u0103 cu aceast\u0103 aser\u0163iune.<\/p>\n<p>Cur\u0103\u0163 de coaj\u0103 \u015fi desfac o mandarin\u0103, scuip s\u00e2mburii \u015fi simt c\u0103 be\u0163ia lucrurilor e felurit\u0103.<br \/>\nAm mai auzit chestia asta c\u00e2ndva, undeva.<\/p>\n<p>Iar eu sunt de-acum SupEReGo.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Prima parte a unei trilogii &#8211; pe care am scris-o \u00een toamna anului 2001. Nu am f\u0103cut nici o modificare asupra textului, cu excep\u0163ia diacriticelor.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cencercam s\u0103 adopt un nou stil beletristic, proezia. Plus versul alb sau liber sau ce-o fi chestia asta. La care am renun\u0163at, \u00eenainte \u015fi dup\u0103 aceast\u0103 experien\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAcela\u015fi han, dar locul mi-e str\u0103in &#8230;<br \/>\nAceia\u015fi nori, dar cerul e senin<br \/>\nAceea\u015fi trestie se-ndoaie \u00een fa\u0163a firelor de v\u00e2nt<br \/>\nAcela\u015fi str\u0103in straniu am r\u0103mas pe-acest p\u0103m\u00e2nt<br \/>\n&#8230;<br \/>\nDe ce te-opre\u015fti din iner\u0163ie ?<br \/>\nPrimul fiind<br \/>\nDe ce nu-ncerci s\u0103 pl\u00e2ngi ?<br \/>\nLacrimi curg\u00e2nd<\/p>\n<p>Stupide \u00eentreb\u0103ri, sau nu, sau &#8230; poate &#8230;<br \/>\nDestul, m-am s\u0103turat de-at\u00e2ta castitate<\/p>\n<p>Nu-njunghi-aceste g\u00e2nduri doar ca s\u0103 \u00een\u0163eleag\u0103 cineva &#8230; \u00een afara mea<br \/>\nNu m\u0103 trezesc din vis doar ca s\u0103 zic c-a fost aievea &#8230; reveria<br \/>\nNu mai conteaz\u0103 dac\u0103 da sau nu tr\u0103iesc<br \/>\nConteaz\u0103 doar c\u0103 vreau s\u0103-\u0163i spun c\u0103 te iubesc.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>A doua parte, pe care o intitulez super patetic\u0103, dar pe care mi-o asum. :)) Z\u00e2mbesc cu gura p\u00e2n\u0103 la nas de ceea ce puteam s\u0103 scriu \u00eentr-o sear\u0103 ploioas\u0103 de prim\u0103var\u0103 a anului 2002. C\u00e2nd \u00eenc\u0103 mai aveam prostul obicei s\u0103 m\u0103 \u00eendr\u0103gostesc. \u015ei mai aveam un obicei prost. S\u0103 fiu afectat. \ud83d\ude00<\/p>\n<p>\u201cUn han distins \/ de na\u0163ie str\u0103in\u0103<br \/>\nS\u0103 scriu \u00een el     \/ mi-aproape \u00eendem\u00e2n\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cemi rog privirea         \/ s\u0103 se a\u015feze \u00een cerneal\u0103<br \/>\nS\u0103 nu \u0163intesc cuvinte \/ din gre\u015feal\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cemi rog cuv\u00e2ntul \t      \/ s\u0103 vorbeasc\u0103 \u00een surdin\u0103<br \/>\nPentru a nu-i g\u0103si nici lui \/ pricin\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>\u00cemi fr\u00e2ng \u00een dou\u0103 \t      \/ chiar \u015fi inima<br \/>\nMi s-a p\u0103rut c\u0103 simt ceva \/ \u00een ea.<\/p>\n<p>Doar con\u015ftiin\u0163a \u00eemi voli\u0163ioneaz\u0103 pa\u015fii, \/ doar ea e treaz\u0103<br \/>\nC\u00e2nd ochiul \u015fi cuv\u00e2ntul tac,\t\t\/ c\u00e2nd inima de-abia cuteaz\u0103.<\/p>\n<p>DRAGOSTEA E ILEGAL\u0102 \t     \/ \u00ceN INIMA MEA<br \/>\n\u00ceNTR-UN REGAT AL CON\u015eTIIN\u0162EI \/ NICI NU S-AR PUTEA ALTCUMVA.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ultima parte a trilogiei, scris\u0103 pe la finele lui 2005. \u00cencepeam s\u0103- mi revin. \ud83d\ude42 Iremediabil \u015fi ireversibil.<br \/>\nAceasta a fost ultima poezie pe care am scris-o.<\/p>\n<p>E timpul s\u0103-mi recunosc naivit\u0103\u0163ile trecutului, s\u0103 z\u00e2mbesc \u015fi s\u0103-mi amintesc toate r\u0103t\u0103cirile \u015fi reg\u0103sirile. C\u00e2t despre viitor, aud \u015foapte.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cEste un timp minunat pentru reconcilieri \u015fi \u00eembin\u0103ri temporale.\u201d, spuse Sergiu Motreanu, repet\u00e2nd \u015foaptele Sf\u00e2ntului Nicolae.<\/p>\n<p>Ast\u0103zi sunt sf\u00e2nt.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u201cS\u0103 stau \u00een hanul din spatele norilor ? S\u0103 \u00eencerc s\u0103 nu mai fiu ce-am fost ? S\u0103 \u00eencerc s\u0103 fiu ce nu voi mai fi ? S\u0103-mi stimulez negativ sinapsele ? S\u0103 sap \u00eentr-o groap\u0103 care m\u0103 sugrum\u0103 pe masur\u0103 ce \u00eei consum substan\u0163a ? S\u0103-mi termin ideea \u00eenainte de-a o \u00eencepe ? S\u0103 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ganduri"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=17"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=17"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=17"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sergiumotreanu.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=17"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}